CFA CFA General CFA = Children and Family Abandoned

CFA = Children and Family Abandoned

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    • Marc
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      I recently learned that there is a free ebook entitled “How to Pass Professional Designation Exams Without Completely Ignoring Your Family”. We are told not to judge a book by its cover, but based on its title this book is likely very relevant to my current situation. And I would love to read it. That is, I would love to read it if I had any time, but I am currently engrossed in studying for a professional designation exam.

      Yesterday was Mothers’ Day in North America and, while I long ago abandoned any hope of making my own mother happy by choosing to raise my children approximately 2,200 miles from her home (or, roughly the distance between London and Damascus – Canada is a rather large country), I am still very much loved by the woman who is both my wife and the mother of my children. Putting up with me requires patience and understanding at the best of times, but the past 5 months have been especially challenging.

      Anyway, I did okay yesterday. As the British would say, I “ticked all the boxes” – card from the kids, present that she had mentioned recently as something she wanted, card from me with a nice, long, written note explaining “how ardently I love and admire” her (she is a big Jane Austin fan). But, to use yet another British expression, “no prizes for guessing” what dominated my thoughts all weekend. When Ms. Marc asked why I was so grumpy, it felt so petty to say that I couldn’t be bothered to put on a happy face for Mothers’ Day because I was I had done an online sample exam and done crap at Ethics, which is usually my strong suit.

      If this guy shows up at our door, I will be single

      I mentioned the above-noted ebook to Ms. Marc and her response was to laugh and say: I only needs to be one sentence long – ‘get them out of the way before you get married or have kids.’

      I’m not in the most objective place right now, but I am inclined to agree with that statement – even if she did mean it facetiously. I would only add that marriage is not an insurmountable obstacle because adults can be reasoned with and understand that this is temporary. But children, especially young children, are a special challenge. My daughter is going through a particularly clingy phase with Daddy (not least because he is rarely home during her waking hours) and I am desperate for the day when I can go back to having my initial reaction be: “Don’t cry Mary, Daddy’s right here”, as opposed to thinking “Jeez, not again, this better be quick so I can get back to studying.”

      F. Scott Fitzgerald once replied to the suggestion that the rich are different by saying “Yes. They have more money.” Similarly, parents are different because they have kids. I know that I am not the only parent to ever go though this, and I’ve only had to go through one exam as a parent, but I can report that it adds an extra layer of complexity and difficulty to an already insanely complex and difficult process. So, my advice as someone going through this now is: if at all possible, get these exams out of the way before you have children, because being a parent is already enough of a challenge.

      Anyway, one way or another, this will all be over in 3 weeks.

      CFOrphans 🙁

    • Marc
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      PS. Let me know if you are unable to see the second picture.

    • lulu123
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      your kids are so cute!

    • Snippy
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      @Marc You deserve an award for this! Really, such an achievement to prepare for CFA as a parent. I can only bow down with respect. ^:)^

    • Zee Tan
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      Awwww @ CFOrphans!

    • Sophie Macon
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      oooh Cutie pies!

    • AjFinance
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      @Marc Your dedication is determination is incredible ^:)^ =D>. I’m sure you’ll cross the line 🙂

    • clwcain
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      My wife and I have five so far. It’s going to be a long road if I do go this route. But it is encouraging to know that others are doing this with families.

    • BobBarkerPlaysPlinko
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      This is on my mind as well. I’m going the year-long study route in order to minimize the day-to-day effect on the kids.

      If I can go 9-12 on Friday nights, and 9-1 on Saturday nights, and an hour or two during the week for review, and rinse and repeat 50 times, I should be all set. Right?

      Clwcain: I have number 4 in the oven. I have something like a toe in the water on proceeding for the June 2014 Level 1.

    • clwcain
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      @BobBarkerPlaysPlinko then we’re in a very similar situation. Last time I did major prep work for an exam, it was the LSAT and it was before we had kids. This is going to be a very interesting ride.

    • Zee Tan
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      @BobBarkerPlaysPlinko then we’re in a very similar situation. Last time I did major prep work for an exam, it was the LSAT and it was before we had kids. This is going to be a very interesting ride.

      I have no experience in this, but it’d be interesting to see what kid-friendly tips you have for other forum members, @marc!

    • Marc
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      @clwcain, I haven’t forgotten about your request for further information on this topic. I’ve been spending the past few days tending to the multitude of matters that I have neglected over the past 6 months, but I will provide a more thorough response in the coming days. I did ask Ms. Marc (who, like you, is a lawyer) about her thoughts on this subject and she said: “5 kids? Not a chance in Hell.” I don’t believe that I’m as pessimistic, but it is definitely a decision to which careful thought should be applied.

    • clwcain
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      @Marc
      Thank you. Please take your time. I’m well aware of how busy you must be. I am not a lawyer…I just went to law school, briefly, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

      My wife and I have been discussing this at length for several weeks and will continue to do so. I look forward to your thoughts, and your wife’s, when you have time to share them.

    • Marc
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      @clwcain,

      How old are your children? Range is fine.

      Just so you know, mine are 16 months and 3.

    • clwcain
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      Oldest turns 10 at the end of this month. Youngest just turned 1. About two years apart in between.

    • nonyximus
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      Cute, kids, but a seriously useless article. If any of you have real tips on how to survive prepping for CFA with children…please do share….

    • Maverick
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      @nonyximus‌ Get your grumpy suit off. There is no need for that kind of tone at all on these boards.

      Here’s a tip from someone with two kids (6 & 2) and moderate to mostly understanding wife. You’re not going to do any study before bedtime, it’s unfortunate but a fact of life. My two year old girl simply doesn’t understand and is more interested in how she can get to my highlighters and decorate the curriculum books. An endless process of 10 minute cycles then ensues in putting her back on the floor before she is climbing my leg again.

      1) Wait till they are in bed
      2) Assuming you’re a halfway sensible parent and don’t let them stay up until midnight fed on mcdonalds and coca cola then they should be in bed by 8. This gives you 3 to 4 hours of study per evening. Use it while you can. There are some nights you won’t want to study, some you can’t. Get to be good friends with strong black coffee. You’ll need it.
      3) If you’re lucky enough to have to have an understanding employer then you may get to do some study at work. This will make your life at home easier
      4)
       It’s not going to be easy. You’ll be tired and grumpy and a lot. It’s not fun with kids, but it is doable.

    • MattCollins
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      I would encourage anyone who is trying to balance studying and having a family life to check out my book. It is a very quick read. Having been in your situation, I was not interested in taking up any of your precious time unnecessarily.You can get a kindle version or paperback on amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Professional-Without-Completely-Ignoring-Family/dp/1460987640 . There are 19 reviews on amazon averaging 4.2 out of 5 stars. Good luck!

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